My Healing Journey through Yoga & The Lessons Learned
Why Yoga?
Yoga makes the greatest amount of sense to me. A sense of mission, a sense of purpose, significance, and internal glow. When I am teaching and practicing Yoga I connect with my authentic Self. Yoga gives me the ultimate fulfillment and inner peace which no other profession or job did in the past. If there is no inner peace, we lack purpose and a sense of living. If we are successful but not fulfilled is the ultimate failure.
As a 500-hours certified Hatha&Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga Teacher, my mission is to guide people to explore the unparalleled beauty around them and within, through Yoga and Wellness so they have a rejuvenated, transformational journey.
Healing the Relationship with mySelf
After graduating college in Budapest, Hungary, I moved to the US thanks to winning the green card lottery and I chose San Diego, CA as my place to live and started my adult life. Until then I never heard of Yoga. Once settled in my new place and home I was browsing to see what types of activities are out there and I found Bikram Yoga in Coronado. I am very open-minded and everything unknown and new excites me so I went to try and THAT WAS IT. Finally, I arrived. This is how I felt after my first class. Only me and my (rented) mat, nobody is watching, and everybody is focused on themselves. I could see mySelf inside and out. We connected - mind, body, and spirit. Shortly, I bought the yearly pass and a yoga mat and I practiced five times per week. I realized that the flexibility I gained was just a side effect, what was calling me to keep coming back to the studio was the mental work. As my teacher said back then, Yoga is 99% mental and 1% physical. My body changed and I changed for the better.
It has been 10 years now since I started my yoga journey and after the first 3 years of practicing in the heated room of the Bikram series, I transitioned into Hatha, Vinyasa Yoga. When I had questions and decisions to make in life or was doubtful I just went straight to the yoga studio and after my practice, I had the answer, the cure. When I had a 9am-5pm job, I could not wait to get out and not miss my 5:30 pm Yoga class. Yoga was therapy for me.
In all those years I tried to fit in - fitting in relationships, in society, in a job, and what should and shouldn’t do. I love how Brené Brown explains the difference between fitting in and belonging: “Belonging is belonging to yourself first - speaking your truth, telling your story, and never betraying yourself for other people. True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are.” - In Yoga I found mySelf.
I am very grateful that as a Yoga Teacher, I have the opportunity to hold the space for my students to discover their relationship with Yoga, and to develop more body & mind awareness which allows them to heal inside and out.
Healing My Chronic Pain
Patanjali described the physical practice of Yoga in Sanskrit as “Sthira Sukham Asanam.” Loosely defined, we should strive to practice Yoga with strength and in a relaxed manner. Sthira translates as strong, steady, and stable. Sukha means comfortable, happy, and relaxed. Asanam refers to the physical practice of Yoga.
In October 2021, my body suffered from tremendous pain. It started with a pinched nerve in the neck and led to chronic pain in the cervical spine which also resulted in left arm Radiculopathy ~ a range of symptoms produced by the pinching of a nerve root in the spinal column.
The pain was unbearable, I couldn’t sleep either on my side and had sharp, shooting pain around my neck and then the tingling, radiation sensation to the arm. I wasn’t able to sit for my meditation. I tried many things, even steroid medications to alleviate the pain but what ultimately helped me was physical therapy and Yoga.
I know it is easy to fall into depression and mood swings when you are dealing with chronic pain. It can harm your social life and self-image, quite destructive. I started to shift my focus and instead of finding out the root of the cause; blaming life and myself, I asked: What does the pain teach me? How can I heal?
The pain and this healing journey through Yoga taught me:
- Compassion - Developing more patience for myself, love & compassion.
- Body Awareness & Consistency - Stretching daily. Emphasizing connective tissues not only muscles. Practicing more Yin Yoga.
- Consciousness - Making conscious choices in my life with full awareness.
- Eating Sattvic Foods - Keeping a healthy and balanced diet & lifestyle. Reducing caffeine and alcohol, anything that can cause inflammation in the body.
- Setting my Boundaries - Learning to say “no”; speaking my truth and letting go of what no longer serves me.
- Respect & Acceptance - Listen to and respect my body’s limits. Observing my thoughts without any judgment or attachment.
For all the friends and people out there dealing with chronic pain know that you are not alone. And remember not to identify yourself with the pain.
If you are having difficulties meditating in a sitting posture, I’ve found Yoga Nidra (the yogic sleep, laying down on your back) as an alternative for my meditation practice.
Everybody needs some healing on a different level and I wish Everyone to find their own path of healing. For me it was, it is and it will be Yoga.
